Busy.

IM FED UP.

i don't know. i don't know whether i should even confront them tomorrow. sometimes some friends' advices make me really confused. i'm done with this. this is so sickening. IT IS SICKENING. i'm fed up.

yeah for you.

i should always show my poker face. i'm getting so good at it. i'm fit to be a poker face actress. *sarcasm*

you know what, being friends with guys are much more easier. it always goes the opposite way. i was having one of those good old chats with my le best guy friend last night though. gaad i miss those days. :C

i'd happily kill you for free best friend. xD

BUT IM FREAKING HAPPY FOR HIM COZ HE FINALLY FOUND HIS TRUE LOVE. hoi. if you're reading this, remember me forever. xD or else i'll happily kill you for free. :D

on a side note, I DON'T FRIGGIN CARE ANYMORE.

BFFs ?

no really. i really don't know. best friends forever or boyfriend forever or whatever.

but my point is, i'm not going to talk about boyfriends. not boyfriends yet. i'm talking about best friends.

how do you define best friends? someone who has the same interest with you? someone who gets along well with you? someone you always hang out with because they're fun to be with? someone who treats you well?

typical bffs eh?

well, think about it. what's more important is you appreciate them for who they are. you don't need a best friend who doesn't appreciate for who you are.

on a side note, i've been falling in and out lately. i make friends too fast. or maybe i'm just too friendly. ._. that's why some people don't really like it that way.

yeah, precisely.

but i'm me. i like myself like the way i like myself. i'm not going to change myself to please others. never.

TO WAR !

i'm in love i'm in love i'm in love.

i'm in love i'm in love i'm in love.

i'm hyperactive i'm hyperactive.
i'm hyperactive i'm hyperactive.

i'm so happy i could even die.
i'm so happy i could even die.

we are the champions.
we are the champions.

this is what i'm imagining right now.

why am i so hyper ?

why am i so hyper ?

i feel like going to war right now.

i feel like a warrior.

FREAKING EPIC WAR MUSIC WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME ?!!

SPARTANSSSSSSSSSSSSSS !!!

CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGE !!!

TO WARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR !!!

shitzo. i keep forgetting i'm a girl. 

-_______________________-.

Back to Reality ?

YEAH reality hit me real hard today. i think i stepped on shit today.

your typical faeces.

and BAM. it brought me back to reality after the break up. :/

really bro?

but they said reality is only for people who lack imagination. i don't think i lack imagination. i'm one helluva wild thinker. okay, so if that quote is true, then i choose not to go back to reality. i will remain in my own world. 

BUT STILL, I HATE IT HOW I CAME BACK TO REALITY BECAUSE OF SOME POOP LYING ON THE ROAD / GRASS.

guess i need something to distract me. 

some atomic bomb explosion in cartoon drawing.

i know ! sound of guns shooting. or maybe exploding bombs. that will kill me mentally for awhile.

I GUESS I'M NOT RETURNING TO REALITY THAT SOON.

*ps: did anyone notice that i'm being a little bit monochromatic today?

We Broke Up.

sigh. so this is how it happened.

original version :

me : *at his house sitting on the sofa while playing with his phone* TOP ...

him : *just finished cooking for dinner for two and was undoing his apron. upon hearing my words he looked startled* chagi-ya, we nal gabjagi TOP cheonhua-eyo ? neo guaenchanh-a ? ujig paenneuleun geuleohge. neo, nal yeoja chingu-eyo, aro ? *smiles*

me : uli, heyeojeo ... *me trying hard not to look at him*

i'm dying.

him : *looks at me directly without saying a word. but he decides to break the silence* we ? museun iyu ? *looking very hurt*

it's a long long way to go.

me : mianhe oppa. *puts down his phone and leaves his house without turning back.*

translated version :

me : TOP ...

him : babe, are you okay ? why are you calling me TOP all of a sudden ? Only fans call me that, not you. you're my girlfriend, okay ?

me : let's break up.

him : why ? why are we breaking up ?

me : i'm sorry.

separate ways, separate paths.

then BAM. i woke up. it was all a dream. i swear it felt so real. it was so weird being Choi Seung Hyun's a.k.a T.O.P's girlfriend. i don't know why, but in the dream i kept wanting to break up with him.

I MEAN WHO'S THAT STUPID ?! NO ONE WOULD EVER WANT TO BREAK UP WITH HIM, never. so now i officially broke up with him. and i'm sad.

gaad. not this facial expression please. it makes me feel even guiltier.

mianhe.  

and imagine if he started singing Monster. 

"I LOVE YOU, BABY I'M NOT A MONSTER neol aljanha."

now i can't just get this song out of my head. and i have to document this dream although it sounds lame. because it's not easy to dream of your favorite korean rapper being your boyfriend but you ask for a break up. 

NOW I'M SAD. only if i could re-dream that dream, i would definitely do it. and i will never leave him.

Forever Alone ?

you know what? i don't even know why am i at school now. there's totally no one in class, i mean i exaggerated a little bit, but still to me there's no one. there's only 8 students, or even 6 students ._.
some went for some important intellectual talk , some went to the school field next door, some disappeared, without a trace.

disappearing.

this feels so downright weird. i wanted to skip classes today but i couldn't find a decent reason why must i skip. it's one of those weird days. empty days. ah life.

i wish to sit on a chair like this, right now, to make the atmosphere PERFECTLY WEIRD.

and now, here i am stuck in the computer lab. surfing the net like no one's business. this is just weird.

my sad face.

forever alone. forever a trombone. forever disowned. now this is just sad. forever a potato too. ._.

AS A CONCLUSION, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY DID I COME TO SCHOOL TODAY.

Sunday.

Rude boy screaming, I guess ?

one thing, i really hate demanding people. demanding for something else in a very rude way. they're rude. LIKE DOWNRIGHT RUDE. stop being demanding. it's not like some people owe you something. it's stupid to think that way.

how sarcastic.

  "generation rude" is what they name the generation right now. ._. rude kids running all around, even in the internet. bunch of hooligans and nitwits. they're nothing but ignorant. and they think their ignorance has become a point of view. even dilbert comics agree with it. 

WHEN DID IGNORANCE BECOME A POINT OF VIEW ? no idea.

exactly, i silently watched you change.

and to those who have changed so much that i don't even know you, i silently watched you change. it was hard to watch you change into someone else. and now you're just somebody whom i used to know.

"AND NOW YOU'RE JUST SOMEBODY WHOM I USED TO KNOW." - Gotye. this song is so relate-able. *don't mind if the lyrics are wrong, i always screw them up*.

LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE !!!

okay time to de-stress. i will be eating chocolates after this post. have a good sunday ya'll ! (: